Diabetes---Would You Choose It?

So, as most of you know, my husband and I are parents through adoption. We are currently in the process of adopting a second time. One of the homestudy requirements is filling out a checklist that states what we are and are not open to in a child and biological mother. These questions range from drug use/exposure, to mental health, to communication before and after the child's birth, and medical problems.


And on this form was the dreaded D: Diabetes.


Would we be open to a child who has diabetes?


WHOA.


I mean, diabetes is a pretty big freaking deal. Well, sometimes.


I often tell people, you know, I'm actually lucky. I didn't get type I until I was 24 years old. I had all of my teen years to guzzle kiwi-strawberry "juice" drinks and consume gobs of Wendy's fries in "cheese" sauce, Pixie Sticks, Denny's pancakes, and plenty of greasy pizza. I didn't think twice about ordering a Sprite at Taco Bell to compliment my massive order of nachos. If I wanted a Blizzard from DQ, I ordered one.


I also wasn't tied to an insulin pump or had to worry about checking my blood sugar, seeing my doctor regularly (or a slew of specialists), or inspecting my feet.


I didn't fret if my newest pair of shoes pinched my toes a little. I didn't wear a medical ID bracelet. And I sure didn't worry about a lineup of potential side effects of high blood sugars.


I had twenty four years---hopefully a quarter of my life---without the disease. My parents weren't checking my sugar three times a night to make sure I wasn't comatose instead of sleeping. I didn't have to count carbs at age three, inject insulin at age six, or turn down cake at a slumber party at age twelve because my sugar was too high. I was free as a child.


I cannot imagine the stress parents of kids with diabetes are under. My heart breaks for these little ones and their caregivers. Diabetes is a hell of disease and burden.


(Now before you think I'm Mrs. Scrooge, I do believe my diabetes has blessed me in big ways. Without it, we wouldn't have adopted, we wouldn't be as healthy as we are, and we sure wouldn't be working hard to educate others).


I just know how hard my disease can be on my down days. Though these days are few and far between, they are difficult and remind me that I'm not normal.


So why would an adoptive parent willingly choose to adopt a child in a medically fragile situation?


Truly, I do not know.


But starting at that darn checklist and going down the list of potential complications was humbling. When you stop and think about the CHILD behind the checklist and not just the disease or disability, it's overwhelming. Confusing.


I joked to a fellow peer at our adoption training seminar last weekend that I would probably be the best person to care for a child with diabetes. I mean after all, I already have a ton of syringes and other creepy-diabetic things laying around. Haha. Not really funny. But seriously, I get this disease. Yes, it tricks me sometimes, but never for long. I won't allow it to win.


Adoption is complicated. And all the choices (and power) an adoptive couple has makes adoption even more complex.


It's funny that the reason we chose adoption for our family was my disease. So, let's put that diabetes behind us, or so I thought. But then the possibility of allowing more diabetes into our family, via a child needing a family, made my heart skip a beat.


If you are wondering, we marked "would consider" on that line.



I don't know what our future holds, and that's probably best. I didn't know I'd end up with diabetes, yet my life is still pretty amazing. Despite needles and blood and co-pays and foot checks, I have a supportive husband, a beautiful daughter, two jobs I'm passionate about, and a happy, cozy home. I'm blessed. I'm blessed despite, or should I say, I'm blessed BECAUSE of my disease.


Funny how some of life's greatest moments and experiences come from the darkest of places.


So cheers to a new adoption process and whatever is in store for our family!